Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
