I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
