Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
