I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
