i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
