This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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