So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
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He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
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He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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