if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I touched a dick in church today
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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