is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize