I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
