Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
It's blow job season.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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