exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
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