ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
