Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
