Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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