you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
