So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
