Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I look excited, but its just a facade.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
