He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
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