i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
