so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
