I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
