I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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