Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Randomize
