She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
