he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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