i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
