New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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