This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Randomize