I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Randomize
