What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
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