we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
