I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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