Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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