Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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