I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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