i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
