hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize