She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
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Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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