the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
