I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize