So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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