I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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