i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
How's work?
Spinning.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
