At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
