dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage