Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
