We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Randomize