There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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