So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
